Seventy-percent of the people who start martial arts training is because they feel weak or have the need to be strong. If somebody feels strong and confident they don’t feel the need for martial arts. There are a lot of reasons why people start training, but it’s typically because they’re struggling with their weakness. Your self defense instructor might not want you to know – that if somebody doesn’t think they’re weak they typically won’t start martial arts training in the first place.
Struggling with Weakness
And guess what, chances are, that your instructor probably started off needing this training that he or she gained from martial arts. Your martial art instructor might have been bullied by people when he/she were young or maybe felt insecure/inferior in some way or another. Same goes with me, I was bullied when I was younger by my brother and by the people at school, and one day I just got tired of it and I said enough is enough.
There’s a Japanese saying that goes like this “he who must prove how good he is, is unsure himself.” That might have been my case when I was a kid. But not anymore. I haven’t been in a street fight for 21 years and I’ve been doing martial arts for 22 years. I’ve been in a sanctioned mixed martial arts fight, sanctioned boxing, and sanctioned grappling tournaments. I’ve done some real fighting, but haven’t had a real fight because I haven’t done anything worth fighting for, since then.
I thought it wouldn’t be worth it if I or my opponent goes to jail. Although the other guy might probably end up going to the hospital or might even die. If I would have to fight, the only reason would be a life or death situation. Life or death situations is something that you can avoid or get out of. I don’t fight for the sake of fighting or hurting people just to prove anything or just to feel better about myself.
So I want you guys to be aware that some martial art instructors are abusive in different ways.
If you come up to a martial art instructor and he’s got an attitude or he has something to prove or he’s very aggressive towards people, then he’s a bully. And what he’s done now is the reversed roles. That kind of instructor was most likely been bullied before and then he found the power and now he believes that he can bully others. You have to be careful and avoid these kind of instructors.
So just watch out – if your instructor typically hurts students, someday he’s going to hurt you. But also understand that there a lot of instructors that spar with their students. I spar with all my students because I know I have the control. If the instructor is just very aggressive and mean beyond any reason, you can just walk out. People like that, once they don’t find value in you, they’ll turn on you.
I highly suggest that you find a good and wise martial art instructor.
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